Need Her
by Simple.White.Lie
Summary: The Night of the Battle of Vulcan, just before the Narada, Spock looks for sleep and comfort. Reflection. Sp/Uh.. REVIEW! FIRST STAR TREK FIC....


Disclaimer: First Star Trek F.F, travelling where few twilighter's have travelled before. Live long and preposterous(wait.. Something's wrong.. It's supposed to be Live long and Protein.. Ha ha ha)

It had been the longest day of his existence. Which was illogical. Every day was exactly the same length. But this day, the day of the destruction of his planet, his home, and his mother.

He had spent the day with the few surviving member's of his race until his physical exhaustion required him to seek sleep. Sleep that evaded him. The memory was still sharp in his head. Amanda Grayson, his mother, her eye's wide with sadness and fear. Falling. In his dreams she was always just out of reach, and always falling.

Getting out of bed, he redressed in his uniform and went to find solace in the only one he would allow to comfort him.

Their relationship had been unknown, un breached territory. Stolen kisses behind closed doors, active intelligent conversations about verbs on the Amalian language, but they had never come out. He knew that she was waiting for him to, as humans word it, make the first move.

He had been terrified. All his life he had tucked his emotions away, hidden them from the eyes of his fellow Vulcan's, then from the Human's loose lips on his tainted heritage, the gossip had hurt just like it had in his early school days on Vulcan. But that was what made Nyota Uhura so special. She was his first friend. Never before had someone looked past the human features and the Vulcan ears and looked at what was beneath the cold calculated exterior. Never had they argued his intelligence without demeaning his heritage or mannerisms.

It had been a study session, a few days before her graduation when he controlled his fear and told her how much she meant to him. And he was greatly rewarded. Her feelings too were deeper than the student/teacher or even aide/teacher relationship they had been creeping around for nearly a year. Awaiting her graduation, and subsequently the tolerance of their relationship, for officer's were allowed romantic relationship's with graduated cadet's, so long as is was kept behind closed doors.

But her graduation didn't come soon enough. The terror's that lay over his home planet sent him back into the stars, and after falling into the trap of her adorable pouting glare, Uhura was right beside him. He looked back briefly, wondering the intensity of the pain had she been on the _Farragut_. And right before the loss of his mother.

Standing outside her room he contemplated the regulations behind the comfort it seemed only she could provide. Before his mind could recall all the rules that frowned upon this act, the door opened, and motioned him in.

She was in wide flowing pants that clung to her small waist and floated to the ground, her top was one of his academy shirt's she had borrowed one night after destroying her own shirt with a slusho. He realised he had not yet looked in her eyes. Not knowing if his control could handle the confrontation of her gaze. The piercing dark eyes of concern that he had seen in the elevator made him ache. She was the solace he didn't deserve, and yet couldn't ignore. It had taken the death of his mother to see the common trait's they had. Accepting. Loving. Understanding.

She stepped forward, tired of waiting for him to look at her, and rested her hands on his shoulders. Sliding them up to his neck, then down to his chest and around his back, she hugged him, her face buried in his chest. Not talking, not demanding he leave, not questioning why he was there. Just trust. Trust that he would talk when he needed to. Right now, he needed touch. To be held, to know he was alive. Not dead like he felt. He needed the emotions that he always pushed away.

Tugging on his hand, She led him to her bed. Her other hand lightly tracing the dark circles beneath his eyes. She laid down and pulled him down with her, not letting go of the contact. He hesitantly rested on his back, then in an uncommon trait, rolled and shifted, unable to find comfort in the bed that was identical to the one in his room.

She pulled his head to rest on her shoulder, his arm automatically curling around her waist. Her arms circled his shoulders and she felt his warm breath seep through the shirt. He realised that his bed wasn't identically.

His bed didn't have this comfort. It didn't have this warm and completely irrational and yet totally logical human. It didn't have the warmth, the trust, and above all, the love he knew she held for him. The cold and now homeless alien, quite uncommon to that of her serene beauty and emotional responses…. Basically, his room didn't have her.

There relationship had been still so fresh when they both had stepped on the ship. Something that he had wanted to explore. He knew of her feelings for him. She had no problem's with the emotion's he had smothered so harshly, he feared they could not resurface. Until today. The anger, pain., utter sorrow that still lick at the corner's of his very core. He merely hoped it would get better. But he knew that it was illogical that it ever would.

He didn't know what the future held. New Vulcan would need re-population. His father would need him in the colony to assist him. The elder's would need him to help with the council. His skill's would be of great use to the colony. But he didn't want to go. They needed him there. But he needed her. Here. Now.

"Sleep Spock. Sleep love." Nyota mumbled. Her hand combing through his hair. He sighed and held tighter to his own reality, thankful for the shores of sleep that crashed and put out all the worries of tomorrow, for now.

All he needed was her.


End file.
